Ok here's something I consciously want to do,
I am going to identify the patterns, of when I am happy and when I am sad, when I am going through intense emotions or when I don't emote at all.
What gets me there, in the sense what makes me happy, what makes me sad, what really drives me ?
I know these things to a certain extent, but I do a lot of stuff subconciously. So I am going to take note and keep track. No particular goals, I would say this is just a start in the journey of discovering myself.
Wow, now, I sound philosophical.
Ok, on that note, here's a few things that made me happy and sad.
-> I lost 27 kilos in the last 6 months. But that's not enough, I still need to lose 7 more kilos to reach my ideal weight. Now, that's happy. It gives me confidence in a lot of ways.
-> I didn't clear the certification, that I took up for the 3rd consequtive time, no actually 4th I think. It's not a very difficult test, just tricky with negative marking and all that. I didn't put in enough effort. I felt a little bad about myself, for wasting a lot of time and rushing in at the last minute. But I did learn quite a bit and decided not to take up the certification again ;)
-> I read 2 books, though I did take a lot of time, I managed to complete them. I enjoyed reading them. That made me happy.
-> Every visit to home, where I meet up with the boys and V, gives me immense happiness, can't
explain in words. My wife A feels why I don't feel that way about her these days ! I keep telling her, darling, we live together, I can't be exited all the time, but with the boys and V it's different, I meet them once in a while. It's like I have this blood gush in my body, as I get closer to V's place, till the moment I see him, the 2 or 3 days I spend there with them is electric !
-> I'v taken up acting, yes, I'v joined an acting workshop, with a production group who specailise in English theatre. Now, that's a lot of fun. I am learning a lot. The peer interaction is brilliant. I am enjoying it totally.
Ok, that's for now, will write, as and when life happens :)